What does Filial Piety mean to me?
Mood:  bright
I have been pondering over the issue of filial piety ever since I talked to Mr. Lim. I remembered when I was young; my grandma had a stroke and was bed ridden. She was totally dependent in all her daily activities. My uncles and father had never considered putting my grandma in the nursing home, even though they do not have the nursing skill to look after her. My aunties and mother just took up the roles to look after my grandma.

Because my aunties and mother did not have nursing skills, my grandma had many bed sores and contracture which indirectly caused her death. However, my grandma was a happy lady because she felt loved by her children and grandchildren. She was never lonely and was comforted that she spent the last days of her life at home with her children and grandchildren. My uncles and father felt that they had done their duties as her sons and never feel guilty about not being filial.

I often wonder if my grandma ever stayed in a nursing home, she may not have to suffer the pain of bedsores and contracture and could even be rehabilitated a healthier stage and lived longer. My uncles, aunties, parents and we grandchildren could always visit her in the nursing home to ease her loneliness. Isn’t this a better way of expressing filial piety?

Will my grandma die even earlier if she stayed in a nursing home because she felt depress that she had been abandoned by her children and grandchildren, after all depression too can cause early death?

I really cannot come to a conclusion about the issue of filial piety, except to ask myself how would I like to be treated in my golden years…...?

Nursing Home for Asian?
Mood:  happy
Mr Lim's aged mother lives in an old folk nursing home. His mother had a stroke and presently could not walk, talk and feed herself. Mr Lim visits his mother at least twice per week. During his visit he will put his mother in the wheelchair and wheel her to the garden. He will talk to her even though she could not reply. Some evening we see him sitting quietly with his mother in the garden holding her hands and comforting her.

One evening I met Mr Lim on the corridor outside his mother's room.

"Hello Mr Lim, bringing your mother for a walk? You are indeed is a filial son"

"No, I am not a filial son. If I am a filial son, I will not send my mother here"

"That's nothing wrong to send your mother to the nursing home. I am sure is because you cannot cope with nursing her, that is why you send her here for better care"

"Ya, my wife and I have to work and my children have their own lives, there is nobody at home, so...my mother has to be here..."

In this modern day urban living where both husband and wife are busy working to up keep the living expenditure, one wonders whether the concept of filial piety exist anymore? Or are we too busy and have no time for our aged parents? Or it is because we do not have the skill to take care of our ill, frail age parents?